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  • Writer's pictureAnkur Kapur

How do you attain happiness?

As I get up each morning and drop my kids at their bus stop, I long to see happy adults. This article is a reflection of self and what it takes to be happy in life.

Where to find happiness?

“Invert, always Invert” – Albert Einstein

When the problem is difficult, just invert the problem statement.

Where not to find happiness?


Yes, do not find happiness in your mind. Interestingly, the mind is the source of all the problems.

What are these problems?


Yes, your mind hallucinates, and dreams. And often these dreams are unpleasant.

“Dost fail ho jaye toh dukh hota hai; lekin dost first aa jaye toh zyada dukh hota hai”

(It hurts if a friend fails, but it hurts more if a friend comes first.) – Interesting dialogue from the movie 3 Idiots. What a nice way to say, our mind is never settled.

You get a good bonus and a raise. This may be instantly overshadowed by someone else making a notch better.

Our mind is always playing these tricks, jumping from one unreal issue to the other unreal issue.

What does it take to tame this mind?

Mind includes three important parts: ego-sense, memory, and intellect. All these three forms give us unhappiness and pain, let's reflect.

“The mind which is tied to the ego-sense and notions of pleasure and pain is the seed for this samsara or world-illusion.” - Yoga Vashishta

The memory of this life and past lives restricts us to see the world in its true form.

The intellect or logical mind wants to prove before it can believe in anything. Happiness can’t be attained by solving any math equation. The experience is always in a nonphysical dimension.

Bhagawad Gita states that the mind needs to be managed/controlled, Swami Vashistha told Ram to destroy the mind to conquer calmness, and Sri Ramana Maharshi states that to attain happiness you need to destroy your ego, memory, and intellect.

How do we conquer the mind?

I am not a guru or a meditation teacher but here is a simple technique. Sit in a calm place, close your eyes, and focus on your breath. Do not think about anything other than your breathing. Even 60 seconds of control over your thoughts will give you calmness.

As you meditate more you will experience your mind dissolving and achieve a wakeful sleepy state. This is a state where you can observe everything around you, but you don’t give any reaction.

Now, you might be wondering if we destroy our mind, then how will we function, and how will we achieve material success?

There are a lot of books written on this subject, the power of the subconscious mind, the flow, secret, etc. However, our Vedas and Upanishads have described it the best. Our consciousness can be conditioned or infinite.

A conditioned consciousness plants ideas (not in mind) in self and the idea translates into reality. We are all connected as one in this universe. If we plant any thought, the fruit is bound to be delivered. However, we should be detached from the fruit.

Even when Arjuna asked Krishna, why do you grant small wishes such as money, power, etc.? Krishna responded by saying “because I want my ignorant child to continue to believe in demi-Gods, eventually he will come to me”.

These are conditions you can give to your consciousness and those conditions will be met. You simply believe in it and do not doubt it.

When do you plant these conditions? In a calm state, achieve a wakeful sleepy state and plant these conditions and let the universe show you the magic.

“I grant you anything that you want, you are limited by your thoughts” – Jesus Christ

Now the last part, the ultimate state of happiness is the state of infinite consciousness. Even if someone attains this state for a few seconds, it will change him/her forever.

Happiness is within you. Wake up with a twinkle in your eyes. This twinkle is contagious, a smiling face will always spread happiness. Imagine a world, in which people are secure, they feel happy, and they spread happiness.

What A Wonderful World

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